Hearts everywhere. Flowers. Chocolates. Social media displays of grand gestures.But beneath all of that, I always come back to this question: How do we create those little, daily rituals of self-love that actually nourish us?
I'm a mummy, a grandma and a coach so I don't have time for big days out at a spa. Plus as my mum used to say, little and often make the biggest difference.
I’m a hugely sensory-led person and I invite you to look for those areas in your everyday where you can gently ‘crowd in‘ those moments of sensory joy.
Two of my favourite senses to work with are touch and smell. They’re incredibly powerful, deeply regulating, and often the most neglected in our busy lives.
Let’s start with touch
Did you know that family therapist Virginia Satir suggested we need:
- 4 hugs a day for survival
- 8 hugs a day for maintenance
- 2 hugs a day for growth
I hear you, that's a lot, how many did you get or give today?
So one thing I do every single morning and something I encourage all of my nutrition clients to do too is this:
When you wake up, hug yourself. Wrap your arms around your body. Smile. Breathe deeply into it, I often squeeze in a silent. “I love you” too. Then, if there’s someone else in your bed, hug them too but don’t skip yourself first. It sounds simple, but it’s powerful. It creates that immediate feeling that everything is going to be okay, that you are held, that you are loved.
Awakening the Body: Dry Body Brushing
Another ritual I love, and I’ll be honest, I don’t do it every day (I’m not a perfect Penny) but probably about half the week, is dry body brushing.
I do it before I get into the shower, using long, sweeping strokes toward the heart. It’s another beautiful way of working with touch, stimulating the skin, waking up the body, and gently activating circulation before we head out into the world.
You can also do this at the other end of the day.
Sometimes I’ll come home, finish work, and feel like I need to wash the energy of the day off me. I love showering as soon as work ends, a real energetic reset and from that point on, I’m usually in my pyjamas by 6:30pm. No clients. No giving. Just being.
Giving Back to Your Own Body
After my little girl has gone to bed, I often take just 10 minutes, that’s all, to give something back to myself. This is where I slow everything down and rub a beautiful body oil into my skin.
I personally love the Mauli Rituals Serenity Pitta Body Oil The scent instantly reminds me of my holidays in India and makes me feel deeply grounded, especially during these cold winter months when our skin (and nervous systems) need extra care.
From an Ayurvedic perspective, we all move between Vata, Pitta and Kapha energies:
- Vata relates to movement, air and the nervous system
- Pitta governs fire, digestion, drive and metabolism
- Kapha is about earth, stability and structure
Many of us live very much in our Pitta energy, burning through the day, pushing, achieving, doing. Overtime this can show up as inflammation, sensitive or inflamed skin, joint pain, and a feeling of being constantly “on”.
This oil helps bring the body back into balance. The frankincense is deeply anti-inflammatory and wonderful for joint pain or rheumatoid arthritis, while the Himalayan cedarwood has this earthy, grounding quality that brings me back into my body.
I spend a lot of the day in my head, this ritual puts me back into myself.
Honouring Sleep as an Act of Self-Love
I think we often don’t honour sleep as much as we could.
Rather than something we just have to do, I try to treat sleep as a ritual, a continuation of the care I’ve given myself throughout the day.
Going to bed with nourishing oils on my skin feels like part of that devotion. You might also love using a pillow mist. I’m a fan of blends with lavender, bergamot and geranium.
Geranium is a beautiful essential oil, especially for women in midlife and menopause. It’s known for:
- Hormone balancing
- Easing mood swings
- Lowering anxiety
- Reducing hot flushes
Spray it on your pillow before bed, or even carry a little spray or hanky with you during the day if anxiety creeps in, a few slow breaths can really help reset the nervous system.
Ending the Day as You Began It
I love the idea of ending the day the same way you start it. With another hug. Because how we sleep sets us up for the next day, and how we start the day sets us up for our sleep. It’s a continuous 360-degree circle, with you at the centre.
So this February, as you gift love to the people around you, I invite you to gift it to yourself too.
Just three small acts of self-love a day:
- A hug
- A moment of touch
- A sensory pause
And don’t forget to ask for or give at least four more hugs along the way. After all… It is the month of loving you.
